The Mayor of Doggieville George W Peorge has been accused of systematic vote rigging following his recent election win. Tactics used included removing people from the voting register by persuading the electoral registrar that they were not people at all but were in fact Americans. He also was seen pointing at the sky and saying “my god the Martians are landing” and while the voters were distracted he stole their voting cards and threw them down a toilet. Worse of all he also got Dr Doggie to design the voting form which meant that only people with one finger or with hands like Doggie himself could successfully put an X in the box intended (or indeed any box at all). Unfortunately George’s efforts were in vain and he did in fact win the election. “Oh well, I suppose I’ll just have to stick it for another four bloody years” he said. He beat the opposition candidate Albert Oggleteats by 1 vote to nil, after a mysterious voter known only as “Dr D PhD”, managed to use the voting form properly and secure a win for Peorge.